Though there for a while I was worried I was gonna be. But I'll get more into that in a bit..
A lot if shit has gone down since I last logged on to dA. I was sick on and off for the longest time, and during all of that I sort of lost the motivation to draw. Which blows, because I feel I was really starting to improve. Especially with coloring and shading. Oh well, I'll pick it up again in the future. I'm actually writing a bit now. Fan fiction, one of my many vices. Bet you can't guess what it's about.. ha.
I got a job, people! I'm currently working at Academy Animal Hospital, and it's freaking awesome. You can bet I'll be enrolling myself in school to become a full fledged vet tech in the future! I get to play with puppies and kitties all day, though it really sucks when some come in that you can't save and they end up having to be euthanized. Still, it's a wonderful job. Very fulfilling!
Now about that death thing. In November I got horrible stomach pains. I'd had stomach cramps before and this was way worse than anything like that. I just thought I might be getting a really bad case of stomach flu, because for a day or so I was vomiting like the freaking crazy chick in the Exorcist. Minus the 360 head spinning. I felt like total shit for a whole day and night, and by the next evening I felt like I was two minutes away from dying. I couldn't sit, stand or move without pain. I had to walk completely hunched over. And that's if I was even willing to walk at all. I had my suspicions about what was happening, but any other time I took a crack at guessing what was going on with me when I was sick I was always wrong. So, I brushed it off and basically told myself to suck it up. By the time it got to the point where I was constantly crying from the pain my parents and fiance decided it was time to go to the hospital. I aruged and fought with them simply because I didn't want to go. I hate that place and it freaks me the hell out. But there was this nagging in my head that told me I'd better get over it and just go. So, I did.
Pre-ER exam showed my BP was slightly low and I had a fever. The nurse believed that I wasn't making my symptoms up (apparently that happens a lot) and sent me back to a tiny room with a bed and a curtain for a door. A doc came in and examined me, then told me what I was pretty sure I already knew. "Well, looks like its your appendix." - I promptly got a rather revealing gown and an IV. This is the point where my fiance started to freak out. Next came the CT. I was stupid enough to forget I had my belly button pierced so I had to do more than one. After I sat in my room for another 45 minutes the nicest nurse ever came in and asked about my pain. I whimpered like an injured puppy and she shot me up with some morphine. I was high in 5 minutes, and it was awesome. No pain, I thought everything was funny and I kept asking the nurses and doctors if they really had sex in the on-call rooms like they do in Grey's Anatomy. Seriously.
The second doc I saw gave me even more bad news. Not only was it my appendix, but it had burst and from the looks of it the appendix had been ruptured for some time. Which means my body was leaking nasty infections into my abdominal cavity possibly infecting my other organs for God knows how long. People die from appendicitis when that happens. They die! He told me he was calling the general surgeon to come in and talk to me about my surgery. He literally said, "If you want to live you'll have the surgery." - Because I know I totally made a face when he first mentioned going under the knife. I'd never had surgery before and the thought scared me.
Another 45 minutes and the surgeon came in. He told me they were gonna try to do it laproscopically (three tiny holes instead of one giant one, for those who don't know what that is) but there was a good chance he'd have to open me up more because it had ruptured. So I was wheeled up to the surgical floor where I talked to the anesthesiologist about the goofy juice she was gonna knock me out with. Last thing I remember was asking if they would play The Rolling Stones during my surgery.
I woke up with the worst sore throat ever. Having a tube shoved down your throat for an hour and a half does that to a person, I suppose. And my lips were so chapped and cracked that they were bleeding. I didn't mind though. I was breathing, that's all that mattered. During the next 15 hours I slept a lot, probably from the massive amounts of drugs they were pumping into my IV. I made Nathan get in the hospital bed with me. The nurses made him get out every time they came in, but he'd always come back. My mom came to make sure I was okay. She didn't know what was going on with me for the longest time because my phone died 20 minutes after walking into the ER. After just over 24 hours the nurse took out my IV, the surgeon came to check up on me and I was discharged.
Post op wasn't terrible, (yay pain meds!) the incisions hurt for a few days after and I was generally sore and tired, but that was cake compared to the pain I was in before the surgery. And I got a week off from work. I went in for my check up and everything was fine. All three incisions were healing nicely according to the surgeon. They were itchy and annoying and I was constantly wanting to pick at them. After he checked me out he explained that my results had come back from pathology and my ruptured appendix was black, rotted, and littered with gangrene. Luckily my organs weren't infected. He said I couldn't have lived much longer with that thing in my body.
I literally could have died. Cease to exist. If I would have stuck with my stubborn ways I would be dead right now, or possibly still fighting for my life in the hospital. I look at my scars everyday and think damn, I'm lucky to be here. Some people hate scars and do everything they can to try and make them fade, but I hope I have those suckers for the rest of my life. I'm gonna wear 'em proudly, like little badges that say: "I survived".
That was the craziest (and scariest) thing that's happened since I've been away from dA. Other than that, and the excitement of a new job, I've been playing an unholy amount of Skyrim and Halo 4. Oh! And helping my sister to come up with roller derby names. I really wanted her to be Rolldemort, but it was taken. Sadly. If I was in roller derby I'd want a badass name like Rolldemort, lol.
I hope you all are doing well, and had a pleasant Thanksgiving/Xmas/New Year's! I shall be lurking in the shadows for a while as I work on the fan fiction I mentioned above. I may even post it here, I don't know. Until then I'll be checking my comments and notes, so stop by and say hi if you'd like!
Much love to you all,
The Girl Who Lived
(Jesus, I couldn't help myself what with the near death experience and the Voldemort roller derby name. I'm such a freaking nerd!)